Marriage Customs

THESE primitive conditions of existence did not deter the early Leyteño from raising his own family and carving out a life of his own. It did not matter if one was poor. Raising a family even in the face of extreme difficulties was a calling no Pintado could resist. To many of them, marriage was a simple matter of getting the consent of their future bride and her parents. It was not a general custom in the islands to have more than one wife "Bisayans always try to procure wife from their own class and closely connected with them in relationship," noted Chirino.

Marriages, dowries and divorces among Filipinos. "Tagalogs do not insist so much on this latter point, they are satisfied if the wife be not of inferior rank," Chirino added.

As tradition had it, uncle and nieces could marry as did first cousins. But brothers and sisters, grandfathers and granddaughters or fathers and daughters could in no case marry. There was also a marked distinction between concubinage and wedlock because the latter, besides consent, had its own ceremony.

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This was where the Pintado of higher social rank distinguished himself from his inferiors. While the poor native was simply united in wedlock upon drinking pitarilla amidst the shouts of friends and well-wishers, the ceremony involving the rich pintado was more elaborate.

When a high-born pintado decided to marry, he called on some freemen to act as go-between. They would proceed to the girl's house, and on reaching there, the group's leader would thrust the spear on the staircase. They would pause and pray to their diwatas for success in this marriage parley with the girl's father. If the man of the house took the spear, this was a sign of welcome.

The mediators were ushered in. They would announce the purpose of their visit. After some discussion, the father would fix the girl's payment or dowry which was usually reasonable based on the groom's capacity. A hundred taels in gold, a number of slaves and precious jewelry. For the most part, the dowry would include what is called as "panhimuyat" (the sum for the mother for having brought up and educated the girl) and the "pasoso" (amount for the wet nurse for taking care of the girl as a baby)

Once the dowry is fixed, the suitor followed by a crowd set out to the bride's house. Carried on a "papag", she is borne on the shoulders of the crowd towards the groom's house. The groom goes ahead and waits at the door, then goes out to meet the girl. If she refuses to go upstairs, he would caress and entreat her, and his father would offer his first slave if she comes up. Again he would present a second slave if she refuses to eat and another one to make her drink.

The couple would then sit side by side each other on the mat and the pagan priest of the village would start the marriage rites. She could marry so-and-so but if the man through dissolute conduct failed to support his wife, she could leave him and was not obliged to return any of the dowry given her. If the woman betrays her husband, he could leave her and take back the dowry and marry another woman.

Having said this, the priest would join the hands of man and wife and sprinkle uncooked rice on all present, giving forth a shrill cry of prayer for the two. The crowd would shout back in closing, after which a lavish banquet would follow with everybody in the village partaking